so long, ebay... (welcome to the bleakhouse )

So recently I've been a bit bleak, reminiscent of my sophomore/junior years of college at the "Bleak House". This time it's not due to a maddening fling w/ a French boy nor to a series of unfortunate summer school exams.
I think I'm reacting to the much delayed Spring season and to my hopeless love-life (or lack thereof). I admit, I'm getting older - and I feel that a lot of things that gave me strength when I was younger has started to lose their effect. For example, when I was surrounded by my close friends at college, it was a lot easier to stay occupied with a countless number of shows, events, or late-night study sessions. It was easy to pick up random crushes and lose them within a month or so with little regret or consequence. But here in this city of endless shows and interesting people, I still feel really lonely.

So. In the past I've relied on shopping to get me through the bleakest of times. Like when I ended things abruptly w/ the beautiful Texan, I threw out half my closet and began my obsession w/ boots. Just recently I looked in my closet and cringed at most of the clothing that I own. How many fucking ugly 2nd-hand tunics/dresses do I need? Or polka-dots, ... come on...really??
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely still heart vintage ... and the healthy mix of casual pieces and old-school rock n roll favorites....but I am ready to throw out half my wardrobe and start again.
This also means saying goodbye to good 'ole ebay, that provided me with endless hours of procrastination and started my short history of credit card debt.

I also need to get my wardrobe back to 80% black, even if no one outside of NY gets it.

I'm not sure what this post was actually about, but I just wanted to say that I am bleak and annoyed and I REALLY WANT TO SHOP, dammit. I don't even need to BUY anything, I just need to go through the motions of shopping...coz lord knows I don't have the money.

Now. The fortunate thing is - my much-needed 4-day trip to Chicago promises just that. Three whole days of "shopping" with close friends and partying at night. I can NOT wait until next weekend.


Oh, and in an ideal world - I would own the following:




Then again, in an ideal world I'd look like this: